What is the protocol…

Today while surfing the waves on the world wide web I stumbled across some interesting, but d@mning information. I heart facebook, but on today I think it’s the devil. Well maybe in a good way, but the devil none the less.


I reconnected with an old childhood friend via facebook. He sent a friend request and I was happy to confirm him. He sent me the customary what’s up and how you doing note. We sent notes back and forth for a few weeks catching up and reminiscing. One day while I was online he im’ed me and asked me to dinner. I said sure just let me know when. He inquired what I was doing that evening, but I was busy so we settled on going out the following Tuesday. We met at 6 and didn’t leave til 11:30 when the restaurant kicked us out because they were closing.


Since our dinner, we’ve had lunches, brunch, more dinners, went to the bookstore, went to mood music, to target and hallmark to pick out birthday cards, basically “kicked it”. There have been no discussions about anything serious and I’m totally fine with this. He’s a cool friend, different from a girlfriend because occasionally he puts his arm on my shoulder or I hold his arm. There are no titles. It’s light and free. I don’t even know what title I would give him or that he deserves anything more than buddy.


Last night he came over. We talked, played boggle, watched Toddlers and Tiaras and the Real Housewives of New York. When he left we did our customary hug and kiss. The kiss can be described as a three second peck on the mouth or forehead. We aren’t tongueing each other down, but he doesn’t kiss me on my cheek like his grandma. Last night he kissed me on the mouth.


I like to click on my friends then scroll through the status updates. His caught my attention so I went to his page. I’ve only been on his page maybe two other times. I’m scrolling down the page when I see something very interesting. His relationship status has changed. It says in a relationship. Hmmm? When I initially checked out his page and on my other visits his status was single. Hmmm? Are we together? Not likely.


I dig deeper into the page for clues. Most of his comments are from guys and the one’s from girls we know mutually and aren’t available. His last two status updates have brought a large number of comments, but nothing in relation to what I’m looking for. He’s been tagged in some photos so I decide to peruse. The first set of pics are from a conference he attended. Boring. The second set of pictures are from a house party. Just lots of people posing. Nothing. I look at the page again. Hmmm? I scroll back down to the bottom of the screen and click to see additional comments. The first thing on the page are more tagged photos. I click the set that look like they are from a birthday party. Aah and the plot quickly thickens! He is in what I like to call a couple photo with a girl, no one but them smiling, heads tilted together and looking happy. What’s more is that people have commented on the pic. The first comment says “Awww what a cute couple!!! Invite me to the wedding.” The last comment says “You guys are so cute together, but you make me want to gag.” Hmmm.  


I do long for the good old days! Before you had to wait for the grapevine to get back to you on details of a relationship or a man to be honest, but what do I do with this instaneous information regarding his relationship status?


My first question is when did his status change? Did his status change this morning to in a relationship? The pictures are from this past Saturday, so even if he declared his love this morning, the pictures paint a ‘he was booed up over the weekend’ scenario. Hmmm. That is a bad question because when it occurred doesn’t matter. What was his in a relationship self doing at my house last night. I’m upset, not so much about our situation, but why he would be laid up on my couch with his head on my hip if he has a girl? Our involvement is very innocent, but I do think kissing me on the mouth and lounging on me are inappropriate if he has a lady. My second question is why didn’t he tell me? We have had discussions about the perfect lady and what he wanted, so why didn’t he tell me he met her? And decided to be with her?


I want to leave a comment about our evening, but that seems so childish. I’m grown and whatever is to be said, I should say directly to him. Plus I’m not good at the sly innuendo nor at being coquettish in written short form. However, I feel bad. Am I home wrecker, mistress? I know the answer is No, but this situation is ridiculous. How old are we? Really, Is he serious? I have some words for him, but then I am not sure exactly what words those should be. We aren’t together so those words shouldn’t start with “how could you” or “Harpo, who dis woman?” Do I say something? Hmmm. Should I just let it go and let the silence be my I am not participating in foolishness, now go live happily ever after response? Is whatever explanation he has going to be sufficient or make me feel better? Probably not.


Still I don’t know what to do in this situation. What is the protocol when you discover information via facebook?


Facebook is the devil!


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